Sleepy three day week

This is a weird week. I didn’t have a Monday because of Easter and I don’t have a Friday because of Anzac Day. During the three intervening days I’ve got to publish Journey (basically done now, yuss) and film a video editorial.

I haven’t actually succeeded in going to bed on time at all this week. Tonight I was totally gonna, but I forgot my washing and now I have to wait for the dryer to finish running.

I shouldn’t use the dryer so much, but I don’t own a car and I walk to and from work every day so I figure it probably balances out.

I have more thoughts about church I guess I want to nut out on this blog in public, but I won’t do that today because I need sleep oh help please I wish the dryer would just finish spinning already!

Oh look here’s an appropriate image to go with this post:


Well there have been one or two gems this month it’s not all bad.

Jesus didn’t die for you

It’s a little late to be blogging about Easter, but I never mentioned it in Holy Week and I won’t get another chance to dwell on it so deliberately for another year at least.

In the current edition of Journey we have an article about experiencing Easter afresh so we remember its true power. One of the things I reflected on over the Easter weekend was the line from Peter Lockheart near the end of that article, “It is good to have that personal notion that Jesus came for ‘me’, but Jesus didn’t come for ‘me’, Jesus came for the cosmos.”

That’s not necessarily a new idea for me, but meditating on that, it occurred to me that thinking about Jesus’ death and resurrection in this way is fundamentally different to how many people live out their Christian faith. At Easterfest I heard a lot of people talk about how, “You might not think you’re good enough, but Jesus died for you and God has a plan for your life.” That’s encouraging in one way, but it really just reenforces the idea that I am the centre of the universe. If anything, that’s the real problem and the real thing I need to be released from.

I’m so thankful that Jesus died for the cosmos. The Spirit is actively at work doing whatever it wills. Whether or not I am a part of that it totally irrelevant, and that’s a relief. I don’t need to save the world—that work is already in progress.

But for whatever reason, I am invited to take part in that work. I am caught up in it as it swirls around the cosmos in which I exist. I’m courted to take part in it, even. I get the feeling that any effort on my part, no matter how small or irrelevant, brings enormous joy to God because he loves me and has enabled me to contribute. It isn’t about me, but I am still able to participate in this story.

Silly old me, so unsuited to so many things, not best at anything, forever having to learn and relearn everything, gets to be part of the many-personed body of Christ and his saving, restoring work. Thank God I’m not an irreplaceable cog in that mechanism, but he saw fit to make use of me anyway.

It’s now too late at night for me to really finish off this blog post how I want, but that’s it. That’s my Easter.

Sorry sorry sorry sorry

I didn’t anticipate how impossible blogging every day from a music festival would be.

This is a picture from my Instagram of Tessa, Shawna and I on a ride at Easterfest. It was a busy/fun/hectic time which was very helpful for me personally and professionally and I’m glad I went. I got the photos I needed and also finished my article yaaay! Just in time.

I’ll continue the world’s most irregular “Blog every day in April” tomorrow.

I don’t want to post today

I’ve been writing all day, so I’m just going to post this Easterfest selfie here. This is what we all look like this very moment:

Easterfest group selfie

Tara and Ethan and me and Mitto. So fetch.

Also I just want to say, Tessa is an outstanding performer and I’m very glad that I get to write a profile on her and Shawna for Journey this month.

Serious business.

Serious business.

Yaaass Janelle yaaass

One of the greatest moments of delight I’ve had in recent memory is when I found out about Buzzfeed’s style guide. It’s well worth perusing, even if you think you’re normally too good for that sort of thing. Just now, for example, I consulted it to check the correct spelling of “Yaaass”. Turns out I’d been doing it wrong. Thanks, Buzzfeed!

The reason? Janelle Monáe and Kimbra are coming to Brisbane next month and I’ve got tickets. I can’t wait to go Dance Apocalyptic at the Convention Centre. It’s going to be so rad. I’ve been a devoted cyboy for years and I’m ready. Yaaass!

Janelle Monae and Kimbra

Good morning cyboys and cybergirls!

Like, for some gays Lady Gaga is their patron diva. For others it’s Lana Del Rey. For me it’s always been Janelle Monáe. I’ve been hers ever since ‘Tightrope’ and she’s never yet put a foot wrong. She’s still tippin’ on it.

Everyone needs to know about her! She’s just the best. I’m less familiar with Kimbra’s stuff (besides her part on ‘Somebody that I used to know’ obv) but I’ve just bought her album so I can pretend like I’ve known all along. I can’t wait for this! What will I wear? Will I go for tuxedo or dancing gear? Or maybe android costume! Planning must begin immediately.

Speaking of musicy things; this weekend I’m going to Easterfest for the first time in a long time. The plan is to keep blogging as per normal. I’m bringing my laptop (I’m not camping, don’t worry), so let’s see if we can make that happen.

My pants are BEDA rahhh

My pants are BEDA rahhh

The internet is for cats

I’m not a massive cat person, that is, except for on my Facebook cover photo because the internet is for cats. But yesterday I changed my cover photo to yet another cat and not a single person liked the post.

Cat cover photo

What isn’t to like?

Is the cat not funny enough? Will people think I really, unironically love cats? I have that problem enough when I post silly pictures of cats, like cats in tights, wet cats and cats eating spaghetti. It doesn’t matter how silly the cats are, some people think I just like cats because they are cats!

These cats are not weird enough.


But no, I only like weird cats. I like them because cats take themselves too seriously, but they are very silly animals. This is the inherent humour in cats.

Trust me I have thought long and hard about this. No other animal quite captures the simultaneous pride and folly of cats. Beautiful cats just don’t do it for me. They just don’t capture the true spirit of cats.

But like I said, I’m not really a cat person in the sense of cat people people. I’m not into cats the same way I’m into chickens, for example. I just think they are kind of weird.

Release your inner cat!

That’s a little better.

I mean that’s what the internet is for, right? Sharing strange, interesting things. What is the point of not-weird cats! Did I make a bad cover photo decision? Was my cat not weird enough?

I think I need to find a new cat for Facebook. I need to find a picture of the quintessential cat. A paragon of feline foolishness! Because that’s what the internet is for. It is for cats.

It might take a little while though, because like I said, I’m not really a cat person. I just think they’re funny. It’s not like I search Google for cats all the time or as if I regularly take selfies with a cat. I don’t want everyone to think I’m obsessed with cats. I’m just doing it because it’s the internet and the internet is for cats.

Bruce is a cat

I’m not really all that into cats.

If anyone finds a good cover photo suggestion I’d really love to see it. Clearly I need all the help I can get.

What is this dog doing here we were talking about cats.

What is this doing here we were talking about cats.

I am not cool it is an illusion

I don’t have much to say today so I’m just going to post this comic:

My self esteem is better than it used to be I'm doing pretty good.

Some people think you are cool. IMPOSSIBLE.

(I’m pretty sure these drawings were originally made by this Tumblr user.)

I’m fairly certain this is how everyone feels all of the time. I know I do. See also: body image, general knowledge, writing ability and professional confidence.


It already says BEDA on it why did you write it again

A misleading tweet

Whoops I missed a day there. You’d think it was for a good reason, but no. Yesterday I went to see Captain America (which wasn’t as good as everyone’s saying it is btw) and then I just clean forgot to blog.

But today is Sunday and I’ll get back on the wagon. My boyfriend and I went to my old church on the Gold Coast today, and now I’m out of time for a full-length post. Here’s a not-so-full length one.

Today a photo of Tony Abbott has been floating around:

I pledge that this pledge was the original pledge Tony pledged.

I pledge that this pledge was the original pledge Tony pledged.

Each of those promises have been broken! How embarrassing, right? I retweeted it because I recall him saying things to this effect during the campaign, but once I got a look at this photo on a screen larger than my iPhone I realised it is obviously photoshopped.

Here’s the original:

Tony Abbott: the real pledge.

I pledge that I will double-check the veracity of government embarrassments even if they seem kind of believable.

I dunno if the photoshopped image was made by an overzealous leftie or by a right-winger who just wanted to show how overzealous lefties can be. So, sorry. I tweeted a wrong thing. Hopefully this post makes up for it.

On a side note, what’s with capitalising “Pledge” and “Carbon Tax” in the original image? Stahp, Liberal Party, stahp.

I pledge that I will do my best to BEDA properly from now on.

I pledge that I will do my best to BEDA properly from now on.

My charmed, gay life

Tonight I went to Freedom2b, which is a support group for LGBTI people from Christian backgrounds. I don’t always go, but this month we watched The Cure—a documentary about gay and lesbian Christians who went through ex-gay programs.

It feels strange for me to go to f2b sometimes, because I’ve lived a pretty charmed existence as a gay Christian. Watching the movie, it really reinforced the sense I have that I dodged a bullet. I never wound up in an ex-gay program. My parents weren’t openly hostile to gay people while I was questioning my sexuality and took my coming out really well. I even had a primary school teacher who set me up to handle coming out in a Christian environment (although I didn’t realise that’s what was happening at the time).

How did I get away with it? I didn’t do anything to make any of this happen. How could I?

Perhaps it was divine intervention. Perhaps I was just lucky. Either way, my gratitude is so deep I’ll never be able to fully express it.

Also, it’s not over yet. Charmed lives don’t always last.

Are you coming to VidCon?

This evening I bought travel insurance so I can go to VidCon. Yay VidCon! For VidCons past I’d have everything organised by now, but this time around my normal practice was disrupted by moving house. Also I’m still surprised by how much time a full-time job takes up. I don’t think I’ll ever get over that.

So I still have confirmation emails to send, domestic flights to book and videos to make among other things. I don’t even really know who is going to be there or not. A lot of my friends seem to not be going this year, which is sad, but at least I get to hang out for a weekend with Steve!

If you are reading this, chances are I want to have a coffee with you and also give you a hug. If you’re going to be at VidCon this year it means we have an opportunity to do one or both of those things, so please make yourself known.

Beda venerabilis.

Bede is probably not coming to VidCon.